Ah... it's Summer. What a great season.
We had the Winkel reunion this past week at Laren's house. Laren and family did a great job hosting and those who came with good attitudes had a good time.
Family reunions are sort of like church. If you go with a bad attitude, you might as well not go because there's nothing to be gained if you're already convinced you'll hate it.
When Mom and I were first married, I had a bad attitude toward reunions. About fifteen years ago, I decided I was wasting my energy being negative. It came clear to me one day when there was a small group of in-laws washing dishes in Grandma's kitchen and I started to listen (I mean really listen) to one of the in-laws talk about all of the problems she could see with the reunion. I found myself wanting to ask her if she could hear herself. It was poison and I decided at that moment that I would never involve myself in that type of behavior as relating to family.
From that moment, I chose to stop all meaningful communications with that in-law. I found that the negativity was so toxic that I couldn't be in the same room with it. So, I am kind and say my salutations, then I immediately get away. I think the only thing she has noticed is that she can no longer talk to me about all of the things she sees wrong with the reunion. I think this has resulted in a separation of our relationship. I say that some relationships are better when they are pared back.
Years ago, when I made this decision, I had allowed myself to become caught in some negative behaviors (listening to her, half-heartedly agreeing, etc.). I decided to do a 180 on the negative behaviors and try to retain the few good behaviors I had. Since making this change, my life has been more full and I have enjoyed Mom and her family even more. I love her family...
Like I say, go to church with the right attitude if you want to gain anything out of it.
Time has a way to exposing character. When the character of some is exposed, the reveal isn't flattering; others are revealed to be amazing, beautiful people.
Attitude is a x-factor. I hope you maintain a good attitude toward your mission and your future.
I love you both,
Dad
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